
A couple of months ago, I bought one of these little ASUS atom-based all-SSD microcomputers that are basically the size of a network hub. It’s now our media server and house file server and we have those again, which we haven’t had for a while and I’m really glad to have back.
There is a story here, of course.
A long time ago we had… a… geez… this is a while ago… a 20/8mhz 286-based computer that came from the surplus store at Microsoft. It even had a TURBO button, which we of course always left on, because TURBO. It ran DOS, and was our voicemail server, which we so hugely did not need because c’mon, seriously, what. But it was cool, because it was the 90s and nobody had digital voicemail at home yet. It looked something something like this, because they all looked something like this:

…but without the 3.5″ disk drive, because 286s didn’t know about threes.
Then we upgraded it to a 386 of some sort – I think, could’ve been a 486sx – when we got our first CD burner, and started running on Windows 95 instead, naming it \strongbow, from Elfquest. Once again, this was the 90s, so kind of cool, even if the CD-R burner was an external box the size of a peculiarly thick laptop. You could’ve killed a dog with that thing, I’m just saying.
But the software that came with the burner wasn’t smart enough then to notice you were trying to burn too much to a CD. It would just fail, then tell you, after coastering your $3 CD-R. THANKS, HP! (Pro tip: never buy software from HP.)
So I set up a tiny partition called stagingarea that was exactly the size of a CD-R to get around this problem; you couldn’t overfill it. And I shared it out (\strongbowstagingarea) so it could be loaded over the LAN for CD burning.
Over time, hard drives wore out, like they do. The replacements were, of course, larger, so I added a media share for downloaded audio and video. By this time, we were using stagingarea for passing files around within the house instead of burning CD-Rs – even our laptops could do that.
Eventually, that got upgraded to a Celeron-ish refurb Compaq, as strongbow-the-286-box’s power supply blew out and old-format AT power supplies were really expensive. But for a while the new box was running off the last \strongbow drive, so it’s still a direct descendant.
From a 286. But we aren’t finished.
A couple of years after that upgrade, I started recording. And I needed a digital audio workstation, so I upgraded the Compaq’s motherboard/processor/drive and started dual-booting it to Linux for my DAW, making the server – now \kimo, also from Elfquest – unavailable when I was working.

Kimo, on right. He’s pretty, but a little dim.
And then \kimo was in DAW mode a lot, and I’d forget to reboot into Windows. So media and stagingarea were usually not up, and fell out of use; we started shuffling around files via flash drives and email. But \kimo’s shares were still around – just hibernating.
About six weeks ago or so, I upgraded the Windows partition on my DAW to Windows 8, which involved wiping that part of the drive. But, of course, I pulled off all the data first, including all that old \strongbowmedia data.
At roughly the same time, someone online was talking about a tiny ASUS they’d bought for like $140 that was all-SSD and not super-high-powered but who cares, right? Turned out that was a special refurb deal no longer available, but I got a similar one for $200, because we’d actually been trying to get to that media stuff again, and with the upgrade, it was on our minds.
So now we have all that data back up and running on this box, \kimo. media and stagingarea shares are both up, and with some really old files on stagingarea, I mean wow. It uses the TV as a monitor, draws hardly any power, and works like a champ – well, after spending a day inspiring me to come up with new ways to kill all the humans, like y’do.
Now, if I could only find some way to hook that old 286’s 5.25″ drive up to the new server…

Great-Grandmother Floppy’s still alive!